I Was A Teenage… Blog!

Yeah, I’d screw Eddie Izzard, only if he’d quit acting like a girl!!! — James Bond
Ugh! The new James Bond film got tons of free media coverage on CNN last Tuesday. All the hyped controversy over a “Blond Bond” was just too much for me, so I called in the SPECTRE television demolition service to deep-six my boob tube. They did such a good job I decided to invest in their anti-satellite laser technology. Anyway, my life is a lot quieter now that we don’t have a TV set. In fact, it’s brought everyone together to appreciate the traditional ways of life from yesteryear — like gathering around the fire place with hot cups of coco while Jack Frost whistles against the window as we spin old yarns from Greek mythology, of Odysseus stabbing the eye from Cyclops’ head. Oh, I don’t know what I’d do without good old-fashioned family values. I’m still going to go see Casino Royale though. Eva Green is a hottie!!!

— ND